Hey, Sack Pack

The Fighting Fistula are going in to the week undefeated. Pay no attention to the prediction listed above. The procrastinating bastard hasn’t bothered to set his lineup yet. He’s facing Regis Island though, and that’s not an easy win. Regis Island was able to take out last year’s undefeated team, The Scumbags, early in this season. Can he be the hero we all need him to be, one more time? And wtf... Are Amazons and Vaders still hoping for their first wins? When do these two power-houses play each other? Week 6? I’m kinda hoping they both retain their utterly-defeated status until then so we get a real nail-biter of a showdown! Holy shit. Set your lineups folks. I can’t stress enough how helpful that is to winning.

Despite the fact that our Yahoo! chat is comprised primarily of Mike fretting about how terrible his winning team is, The Fighting Fistula are, as of this week, the only undefeated team in the league! I don’t know if our Yahoo! chat app can handle the flood of bellyaching we’ll receive now. It’s gotta feel good for Backus to the Future to get that sweet sweet win over Amazons, the coach who picked his team in the draft because he totally bailed on us even though we had set plans for like a really long time... but that’s cool. Grats also go out to GO BIRDS, The Astrocats, Planet express, Regis Island, and The Scumbags. Shady Bradys were totally robbed taking a loss with a score like that.

Grats this week go out to The Scumbags, The Astrocats, RG3POs, GO BIRDS, Backus to the Future, Planet Express, and Regis Island... wait.. what? I didn’t type The Fighting Fistula in the win-grats this week? That can’t be right. Let me double check those numbers... Well holy shit, he’s been dethroned! Our hero of the league is RG3POs! On behalf of the entire league (minus The Fighting Fistulas, obviously), thank you sir. You have done a great thing this week. GO BIRDS and Good Picks AND Snoochie Boochies and Scumbags decided to self-handicap and each played an out player in the same position on each team. That’s a weird fetish you all have. I don’t like it.

We’re leaving Week Two with 5 undefeated teams! We have The Scumbags and Snoochie Boochies bringing in their first wins of the season. We’re also leaving Week Two with 5 teams still working for their first win. It’s a mixed bag of emotions up in here, but it’s early and really it’s still anybody’s season. Grats to Shady Bradys, Good Picks, The Fighting Fistula, RG3POs, Lollipop Guild, The Scumbags, and Snoochie Boochies. Now get your shit ready for Week Three

Last night finished up week 1 and we have our fist set of wins and losses for the season. A big GRATS goes out to Regis Island, RG3POs, Shady Bradys, Good Picks, GO BIRDS, The Fighting Fistula, and Lollipop Guild. Don’t get cocky though. Many wins were close calls or the direct result of luck. Things will change in the following weeks. Regis Island also gets a big THANK YOU for preventing The Scumbags from restarting their undefeated run again this season (and not collusion needed!).

We finally have some game play to put to the match-up projections! It’s not much but we’ve been waiting so long for this to get started. Currently The Scumbags, RG3POs, Shady Bradys, Snoochie Boochies, The Astrocats, The Fighting Fistula, and Lollipop Guild are predicted to begin their undefeated streaks, but there’s still half the league plotting and planning and hoping against those forecasts. Good luck to everyone! But seriously, half the teams are going to lose. That’s just how this works.

Today is the day! The 2018 season starts to-fucking-day! Be sure to set your line-ups, dump those newly injured/suspended players and scrounge around the Free Agents list! It’s all downhill from here folks! I can’t fucking wait for the tears!